Is Over-Apologising Hurting Your Business?

How often have you said 'sorry' to someone this week?

Probably too many!

Women tend to use apologies as a way to cushion their actions.

It goes waaaaay back to when women were (and let's be honest - can still be!) penalised for verbalising their opinions, speaking up and speaking out.

If that baggage alone isn't enough to carry, we've also been hardwired to worry about hurting other people's feelings and causing offence.

Look. We're not saying apologies aren't important.

They are! But ...

We need to stop saying 'sorry' for things that we actually have no reason to apologise for.

The first step is being more aware of the language we use, in particular our overuse of word 'sorry'.

For example:

❌ "I'm sorry, but I don't understand your instructions."

❌ "I'm sorry I didn't take your call at 11pm last night."

❌ "I'm sorry, but I can't meet our agreed deadline because I'm still waiting on xxxx from you."

❌"I'm sorry to bother you but you haven't paid me for x months."

As women - and as business owners - we have to stop apologising for taking control of our businesses!

There are many alternative ways to demonstrate understanding with our clients, colleagues and team members without using 'sorry'.

For example:

✔️ "Thanks for your patience ..."

✔️ "Is now a good time to ask you a few questions ...?"

✔️ "Thanks so much for letting me know ..."

Or ...

✔️ Simply drop the apology all together! Just start saying what you want to ... without feeling like you're tip-toeing on eggshells.

Do you want to be seen as a Weak Wilma or a Confident Carol?

If you're still not convinced of just how powerful the language you use is, we're gonna tell it like it is ...

🙅‍♀️ Over-apologisers come across as weak, as pushovers or sometimes even excuse makers.

🙅‍♀️ Always saying sorry for things you shouldn’t be apologising is annoying for those on the receiving end to hear.

🙅‍♀️ Saying 'sorry' when not required actually lessens the impact of when there comes a time something happens that you really do need to apologise for.

Breaking the 'sorry cycle' that for centuries we've been hardwired for isn't going to happen overnight.

In fact, it's likely to be one of those annoying forever balancing acts.

But the energy the re-training takes is absolutely worth it in order to gain and maintain the respect we deserve as women in business.

Sam + Jo xoxo